International Baccalaureate

April to July 2016 - Softball

For my third year of playing softball, I decided to try out for a higher level as I wanted more of a challenge. I played on a B team and I was not very into it all season. I was very hard on myself and I desperately wanted to succeed, only months after finishing chemotherapy. I wanted to play a sport so soon after treatment because I was tired of being weak and wanted to feel strong again. This didn’t really work as I ended up being more disappointed that I couldn't play like the other girls. My kidney stones frequently flared, making me feel nauseous. I didn't hit a non-foul ball until the very last game of the season. So there I was, playing with my little buzz cut and skinny limbs. I feel kind of embarrassed about it now but I do impulsive things like this when I want to prove something to myself. None of them knew I had cancer (I think) because I didn’t want to be pitied again - it gets very tiresome. The team I was on was full of very athletic girls and we ended up winning silver at provincials, so that’s super cool considering we only won a single game all season but I didn’t really contribute to that. This sounds super sad, so basically, I tried to do something but my spirit was not in it. The fact of the matter is, I still tried and the attempt is better than nothing - at least I got some exercise!