Closing Remarks

In conclusion, doing CAS was of great benefit to me. It added joy and fulfillment to my life as I gained experiences, knowledge and life skills. I know that I will use the lessons learnt from my volunteer work all my life. If I can provide another human being or life form with something that will make their life better, even by a small increment, I will consider myself successful.

CAS really emphasized how small changes add up to make big differences. You never know how a seemingly insignificant thing or gesture could mean the world to someone else. Doing kind actions for people is mutually beneficial; it gives you satisfaction and them, joy. Just complimenting someone you can make them feel worthy, and brighten their day. Isn't that precious? We have an awful track record, but it's our duty as fellow humans to take care of each other.

SERVICE III

May 26th, 2017 - Relay For Life

Today I volunteered at the Canadian Cancer Society’s Relay for Life - an overnight walk to raise money for the Canadian Cancer Society -  where I worked mainly in the Kids Zone. I supervised children playing games and on the bouncers, did arts and crafts with them and other things to that degree. When I heard about this event I knew I wanted to volunteer to become more involved with the cancer community. I am glad I did so, because I discovered there they have a special thing for cancer survivors, which I am (as previously established). There, I was able to register as a survivor and I was treated to lunch and a victory lap around the track. It felt so good to know that I was among people who understood, and people fundraising for the cause. Next year I plan to make my own team so I can participate more.

I was expecting to see more people there, but it was still a good turnout. There were so many survivors in yellow shirts, reminding us how common cancer is. Most of them were adults, with way less kids and I think I was the only teenager. This made me think that I could get my friends involved from our teen group at CancerCare next year, which would be super fun. The cancer community is really strong because of the understanding that survivors hold for each other. You truly can’t understand it unless you’ve gone through it, and even though there are thousands of variations of the disease, there is a universal camaraderie. I met this amazing woman there named Tammy in the midst of not knowing anybody. We exchanged stories and she reminded me how easy I had it. Some people never find a cure - you just have to live with it, knowing the mutated cells are inhabiting your body. If that doesn’t spur you to get out and spread the word, what will?

The survivor lap.

Tammy, a brilliant lady and I decked out in CCS gear.

SERVICE II

 February - June 2017 - The Grace Hospital

My duties at The Grace Hospital Youth Program include: mail, water and meal delivery, gown folding and anything else that needs to be done. I volunteer with a group of girls and we work together to do this. It is very enjoyable; we have a great time while helping patients and staff at the hospital. I enjoy being in a hospital to help, rather than be the patient like I was for so long. It is a pleasant change.

I go every week for an hour and a half and I enjoy it. Being in an adult hospital makes me feel very conflicted. I really loved Children’s Hospital despite the unfortunate circumstances for these reasons: the staff, the environment and the care made me feel at home. I previously thought I hated hospitals - even the food wasn’t so bad, though I ate next to nothing (my parents say it was relatively good). The Grace makes me hope I never have another surgery again. There is a stark difference in adult and children’s hospitals. This isn't to say the treatment there is anything less than great, but it’s definitely not the same. I know without a second thought that I’d much rather work someday in pediatrics if I go into medicine. I think volunteering here is a great experience because it made me so much more grateful for my hospital stay. I get to see how another hospital works and directly observe how the patients feel about it as well (many complain about the food, to no one’s surprise).

I am coming up on my last week of volunteering at the Grace as I'll be away in the summer. I think that I will return as an adult volunteer, depending on my schedule next year. I'll be able to do more things like emergency room etc., so I'll see more of the hospital. I also really want to volunteer at Children's and CancerCare, since I'll be downtown for University anyway, so the Grace might not stick, but it was a great experience for the time I was there. I wish I could've started earlier!

SERVICE

February - June 2017 - Deer Lodge Hospital

Beginning this volunteer job, I was extremely uncertain and skeptical. I had never really interacted with seniors other than my gramma, who was in a care home. Visiting her there as a young girl was a little scary, so I didn’t know how I’d be. At Deer Lodge, I transport residents to and from evening recreation so they can listen to music. This involves me asking them if they’d like to come, which was very intimidating at first. I have become quite comfortable there as I become more familiar with residents. They all really like me and I get many compliments on my curly hair. Most of them that come to the music are very nice and appreciative of us.

Being there makes me realize how lonely some of them are and I am glad that I can provide them with some human interaction, beyond nurses and fellow residents. One of the things that is very noticeable about seniors is their desire to touch. They are very much deprived of human connection, especially those whose family rarely visits. Many will reach out to grab your hand when you speak with them, which I think is very sweet. It may be a little starting at first but when you come to know them, compassion takes over.

The last time I volunteered, a man invited me to to his wife’s birthday party (she lives there). Unfortunately, I couldn't make it but it was so nice of him to invite me. I felt bad that I couldn't go, so I brought her a set of fake flowers to last long and liven up her room. They were very appreciative which made me feel so good. I love to do whatever I can. Just seeing how a simple thing can make someone's day better is what aim to do for these residents. Meeting a new resident and inviting them to music is one of my favourite things because they always end up loving it, so now they have something to look forward to every thursday. I recently met this new woman, Anna, who was very lonely and had no one to talk to. When I invited her to music, she learnt of the possibilities at Deer Lodge and that made me glad. Now, every week I bring her to and from the music and help her pick up some new books at the library on the way (she loves murder mysteries). She is the type of lady who seems closed off and sort of angry, but is a real sweetheart and just wants some company.

The first resident I connected with, Mr. Hansell just turned 102 years and it’s amazing how functional he is still. His memory is a bit off and i’m not totally sure if he remembers me each week, but it’s remarkable how strong - and sassy - he remains. Not all of them are incapacitated, so maybe if we’re lucky, we can live that long. But that’s a whole other debacle.

I am so happy that the residents like me because I was skeptical about how I’d like it there and how I’d be with senior citizens. Now, I realize that I am very good with people of all age, despite my shyness. I think that having this skill with old folks is extremely valuable. It ties the older generations with the younger ones and allows me to better connect with my community. Often, old people are forgotten about because many of them live in homes, hidden away and we don’t take the time or effort to connect with them. I think there is a sort of taboo around senior’s homes, and I am not innocent in this prior to volunteering at one. Frankly, they freaked me out and this is not uncommon in people my age and younger. I honestly have gained such a huge appreciation for life whilst volunteering at Deer Lodge. At the same time, it saddens me to know that I could someday be in their position - somewhat helpless and many totally dependent on others to survive. I hope I’ll be lucky enough to never have to be in a home. The conditions are not terrible - they make it as comfortable as possible for all the residents and all the staff really care, but I can’t help but think that I would hate it.

I haven't any clue whether I'll return to Deer Lodge in the fall. I don't think so right now, but I might really miss it. I do enjoy helping these people and interacting with them, so maybe I could go back as a friendly visitor. My schedule might be crazy, so only time will tell! The Deer Lodge was a great decision of mine. I am so glad I applied, even though I only had half a year of it, it has made me much more well-rounded.

ACTION IV

March 11 - 18th, 2017 - Dogsledding

Thanks to the lovely child life specialist at CancerCare Manitoba, I was given the opportunity of a lifetime: to participate on a week long dog sledding expedition in Charlevoix, Quebec. This trip, organized by “On The Tip of the Toes Foundation” was a therapeutic adventure for teenagers who are going through or have survived childhood cancer. It was there in the wilderness where I met thirteen amazing people who quickly became my friends, along with six equally awesome adults. Really, I could write a whole novel about this trip, but that defeats the purpose of a blog.

So basically, this is a giant cancer perk; one of those aspects of my life that cancer has improved. It was an adventure meant to test your physical and mental abilities to enable you to push yourself beyond what you thought you were capable of. After treatment, the body is weak and beaten. Dogsledding for five hours or more a day is definitely a great way to force your body into being strong again. I didn't realize how much of a sport this really is. It requires focus, strength and a connection with the dogs who are your wheels, so you better respect them. I'm proud to say I pushed my body to its limits. We went a very long I-don't-know-how-many-kilometers snow shoe hike, uphill. I thought I couldn't make it as I was very out of shape. I wasn't the only one so that's good. One of the leaders, Mario taught us how to go slow and steady to preserve our strength. The majority of people were far ahead so it was a little disheartening but all that matters is that we did it! Getting to the top and collapsing was the best and gave me great satisfaction.

I went into this trip not really knowing what to expect, and came out of it feeling better than I had in years. It’s amazing how well you can bond with someone while sharing a dog sled - one ski per person or with those who have different first languages. When you have something as significant as cancer to connect you, who cares if you speak French or English? We all became friends, and I got to brush up on my French, which was fun. Teamwork is necessary if you wish to stay on the sled, on the other hand, wiping out with someone is equally as bonding, as I experienced.

Laughing away with Marjorie and my original dog team after wiping out minutes before this photo.

Being with over sixty dogs in one place is the greatest thing ever for a dog lover like me. They were so sweet and loving and I was always eager to help with feeding and tending to them. I almost memorized all of their names, but some of them looked very similar and some were related, so you can see how this would be difficult. This trip taught me how valuable life is and how we shouldn’t waste it, which is super cliche, I know. But really, adventure therapy is an incredible concept - the healing it provides is astounding. I left Quebec feeling light as a feather with the emotional weight of cancer off my shoulders. It ignited a desire in me to travel, because seeing the world and experiencing new things is so important! I learned a great deal about myself, the earth, people and animals. I connected with the elements of earth and with myself. For the first time in a while, I felt at peace with everything. As a great woman said on the trip, go out and fill your backpack with life. Pack it full with experiences and fun, let it overflow. Life is meant to be lived, so get out there.

Goofin' around after a long snow shoe trek uphill that almost killed me.

(I realize this is hard to do if you don’t have the money, but I’m speaking figuratively. Don’t just sit on the couch, go do something, appreciate nature. Look for life’s splendors).

ACTION III

Summer 2016 and 2017 - Running

I enjoy running as my dose of daily cardio. Running is something that appeals to me because I can do it at my own pace and I try to fit a run in whenever I can. It’s not a team sport where I feel pressured to succeed on behalf of my teammates, or feel inferior to others. I can play some music and run at my own pace in my solitude. I love running through the forested trails at my cabin and my dog, Raya also loves to run and I’m working with her on training. I take her with me and she gives me motivation. She is an extremely happy dog who never seems to tire out; she inspires me to keep going. Sometimes, running is very hard for me as I have asthma. Running is also quite hard on the body. Doing it everyday is not possible for me when I’m working as well because my ankles and legs get too sore. I have to force myself to put one foot in front of the other, but I like that I can push myself to a distance; running is all me. Knowing that I can’t rely on anyone else but my own body allows me to truly know that I’m doing it to improve myself. I like knowing that I can train my lungs and chemoreceptors to deliver adequate oxygen to my respiring tissues for this task. This goes to show that running requires lots of training in many locations of the body. It is complex, which means it’s worth something.

ACTION II

August 22nd, 2016 - The Swim

Swimming across my lake is not something I haven’t done before. I did this a day before my birthday when I was twelve years old and super energetic. I’ve always loved the water and swimming so why not do it again four years later? I decided to do this in the summer of 2016 before my 17th birthday to better improve my strength after being weak for so long. Falcon Lake is not very wide; it’s one mile across, but it was extremely hard this time. Surprisingly, it only took me 38 minutes, but it felt like forever. I couldn’t keep up my front crawl and had to go quite slowly. My lungs were burning and my limbs were tired, but I made myself keep going to reach the shore. It gave me a sense of accomplishment, but also defeat to know that my body was not in great shape still. Swimming is something I’ve always loved, but it is extremely physically demanding and I have to focus everything I have. In order to do this, I spent the whole summer leading up to this training, but it wasn’t enough. I ran and walked and swam laps to and from cabins. I tried doing this everyday, but I also worked full time, so sometimes I was much too tired. This serves as a reminder that progress can be grueling, and slow but it’s all worth it in the end. You can’t give up because the finish line is what you’re fighting for.

Me with the time and date of my swim.

ACTION

April to July 2016 - Softball

For my third year of playing softball, I decided to try out for a higher level as I wanted more of a challenge. I played on a B team and I was not very into it all season. I was very hard on myself and I desperately wanted to succeed, only months after finishing chemotherapy. I wanted to play a sport so soon after treatment because I was tired of being weak and wanted to feel strong again. This didn’t really work as I ended up being more disappointed that I couldn't play like the other girls. My kidney stones frequently flared, making me feel nauseous. I didn't hit a non-foul ball until the very last game of the season. So there I was, playing with my little buzz cut and skinny limbs. I feel kind of embarrassed about it now but I do impulsive things like this when I want to prove something to myself. None of them knew I had cancer (I think) because I didn’t want to be pitied again - it gets very tiresome. The team I was on was full of very athletic girls and we ended up winning silver at provincials, so that’s super cool considering we only won a single game all season but I didn’t really contribute to that. This sounds super sad, so basically, I tried to do something but my spirit was not in it. The fact of the matter is, I still tried and the attempt is better than nothing - at least I got some exercise!

The team at provincials. 

Coach bestowing the silver medal upon me.

CREATIVITY II

October 17th, 2016 - The Inside Ride

The Inside Ride is a Canada-wide fundraiser for pediatric cancer research and treatment. The money raised form this event was for CancerCare’s pediatrics unit, and all the doctors and nurses are extremely supportive of this event. It was my first year there, and I had heard about through our Teen cancer group and the child life specialists. We made a team to bike 5 minutes each to raise money. Our team did not raise very much, but we got second place for team spirit! There were 5 of us survivors in our group and treatment was all quite fresh to us, so we had lots to pedal for. Our team captain was the ambassador for this event and he made a wonderful speech that made me very grateful to have the effective care that I did. I heard a fact there that I still think of a lot - the number of children diagnosed with cancer every year hasn’t changed, but the number of children being cured has steadily rose. As fundraising continues to fund research, more cures are being found and more effective treatments discovered. This is why we keep fundraising and spreading awareness. Maybe we will never cure cancer completely, but we can still weaken it and continue to fight.

Pedaling with the team and friends of team cheering me on.

The entire Inside Ride clan (I'm at the front with my team).

CREATIVITY

August 27th, 2016 - The Social

The idea came from my sisters who wished to hold a social for me to help give back to the amazing organization that is, CancerCare Manitoba. Designing this social took a boatload of work from my entire family and many friends who helped us pull it off. Held at Falcon Lake, our summer home, the local community club was generous enough to let us use the club rent-free, the DJ volunteered his time and equipment, and many people volunteered during the night to complete various tasks. The community support at Falcon Lake was overwhelming and we raised a total of $7158 for CancerCare. I decided to direct these funds to the General Funds pool. I waffled between pediatrics and ovarian cancers but I know that money is already poured into pediatrics like no tomorrow. General funds are used immediately for various things such as: equipment and supply replacement, repairs, treatment, etc. the money we raised was to be used for anything that was needed right away. It is for that reason that I chose to direct it there, as I wanted our efforts to take effect quickly.

My siblings and I with the decor.

An Instagram post from CCMB (that I couldn't crop) of my parents and I handing in the money to CCMB Foundation.

My dad and my sister and I to an extreme lesser extent asked the local businesses for raffle donations and everyone was super generous. Among many items, we received a signed Jets jersey. We were at the community club during the event all night. My mum and I collected tickets at the door and I stayed out of the actual party because I wasn’t eighteen. It was a very successful event and my whole family came out to support it and help. I never expected my siblings to want to hold a fundraiser in my honour so it made me feel really grateful to have them. Our goal was tp raise $5000 but we thought it might not happen because it was quite late in the summer and not all of the tickets were sold. Discovering the final tally was an amazing surprise because profits were above and beyond what we thought possible. We threw the social together very quickly, without really knowing what we were doing too. Our raffle and grand prizes were very good so people went crazy with those. I think people partying at socials are fine with spending money when it’s for a good cause (and they’re drinking alcohol). Since cancer is so common, most everyone knows someone who’s affected by it. I unexpectedly met someone there who was a survivor and was once involved in a teen group I am now a part of. He was so kind and wanted to help in any way he could, though we didn’t know each other. That’s the type of thing that reminds me of the good in the world. Kindness truly does radiate.

Introduction to CAS

Creativity, action, service. These three words are something I’d always wanted to incorporate into my life as a member of my community both locally and globally. The desire to do volunteer work began fresh into high school, but I never knew how or what to do. In grade eleven, that changed when I was diagnosed with dysgerminoma: a rare type of an ovarian germ cell cancerous tumour. I had a surgery to remove it followed by three rounds of chemotherapy. I missed four months of school, which was very hard for me. Being involved in many IB courses, schoolwork was all I focused on. The months leading up to my diagnosis in October were very hard - I lost all motivation to study or even go to school. Chemistry was the big one for me. My biggest concern was: “how will I catch up?” - I know, crazy, right? IB had me so over-obsessed with my grades that I didn’t realize how serious my situation was. I thought I could still do homework and go to school, but chemo made that impossible.

What I’m trying to convey is, this experience drastically changed my outlook on life and gave me a desire to help people. After being sick, I saw that school isn’t everything and you must have a balance. I am not saying that IB isn’t beneficial, but it is very hard on students. CAS provides a break from essays and labs and focuses on community. Full IB was too much for me, but I decided to carry on with the CAS extra-credit piece because I truly see its value. I wanted to get volunteering largely due to all of the sick children who are so innocent and happy although they have a terrible disease. I encountered these kids during treatment and hospice, along with the volunteers so often present so I thought I could do the same once I was better. Through this program, I have learnt many things, gained new values and met many people who continue to shape my life.